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Patrick J. Simmons is a webmaster/designer, snow tubing professional, and complete moron. He is a Caucasian male, stands about about 6 feet 2 inches tall, weighs approx. 245 pounds, has brown hair and eyes, and no visible tatoos or birthmarks. ARDEBIS
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Tuesday, December 4, 2007
An Example Post from Patrick
This post stolen from Perpetual Thursday:

Father Peter Daly has one of those smiles that makes me want to punch him just to get him to stop smiling. I'm sure you know the kind of smile I'm talking about. (The guy who does the television advertisements for eHarmony.com has one too. I'm not really sure why, there is just something about the way he smiles that I absolutely cannot stand.)

Father Daly is a writer for the Catholic News Service. I've never really paid him much attention until just recently, when he decided to write a short column about the Tridentine Mass and the motu proprio.

As you may have guessed, it wasn't a very nice column... In fact, it painted a completely negative view of the both the Tridentine Mass and those who go to it. It also gives false impressions about the Mass and people's reasons for attending it.
Father Daly accomplishes all of this using his own research into the subject: "The parish just west of mine has been celebrating the pre-Vatican II Latin Mass for more than 15 years...Almost nobody comes."

Before going on, let me establish that his research ends conveniently with this one parish. This is a very popular method of supporting one's argument: 'Well, it's like that close to me, so it must be like that everywhere.'

Now that he has implied that almost nobody wants to go to the Latin Mass, he moves on to say who does want to go, and why: "Most of the people who come are elderly. They like this Mass because it is quiet and short."

Ah yes, quiet and short. Now, just in case you get the wrong idea here, he is implying that "quiet" is a bad thing. Silent meditation, reflection, and prayer apparently don't count for anything. Someone ought to tell the monks...

Now for one of my two favorite parts of his column: "My neighboring pastor is a bit exasperated by the whole thing. It means a lot of work for him. Under the old liturgy, the priest did just about everything...For my neighbor the extra liturgy means has had to move the alter for the Mass facing the people...Then he has to set out different books and change into different vestments. Most inconvenient of all, he has to prepare and preach a different homily."

Now, rather than point out that if we ditched the Novus Ordo, none of the above would really be problems, I'd like to focus on the words "most inconvenient of all." A very poor choice of words on Father Daly's part, even if the perfectly express what he's getting at here: the less work the priest has to do the better. We're happy to server God, provided it's not inconvenient.

Here's where it gets really good: that's EXACTLY the same argument he used against people who go to the Tridentine Mass! "Under the old liturgy, the priest did just about everything. The people who come to the Latin Mass like that part of the tradition just fine. They don't think they should have to do anything but show up."

There it is, in between complaining about how hard the Tridentine is for priests, he makes the utterly bogus statement that the reason lay people go to it is because they think the Novus Ordo is too hard. Brilliant.

As the column moves on, he continues this line of thought: "A few folks from my parish go over to my neighbor's parish for the Latin Mass...They don't like all the singing at my parish. They don't like shaking hands. They don't like Communion in both forms. They don't like having three readings. They tell me what they like most about the Latin Mass is that they can get in and out in less than 45 minutes."


"They don't like all the singing at my parish."
Two things to note: there is singing at the Tridentine Mass. Not always, but often. Almost every Latin Mass I've gone to has had at least two songs. Even when they don't, I don't see a problem with it. No singing is better than the Protestant hymns they are very likely hearing at your Novus Ordo.

"They don't like Communion in both forms."
First off, it's Holy Communion. Secondly, what's better: people kneeling down and taking the Holy Eucharist reverently on their tongue, or people sauntering up, taking the Holy Eucharist in their dirty hands, popping into their mouth and hopping over to drink His Most Precious Blood out of a cup full of germs from every other person at the church? It's not just about reverence, it's about the spread of germs too.

"They don't like having three readings."
Let me think... The Epistle, the Gospel, and the Last Gospel... One, two... Well, maybe I'm just an ignorant Traditionalist, but it certainly seems like that makes three readings to me.

"They can get in and out in less than 45 minutes."
This is true for your average Low Mass, but not a High Mass. A High Tridentine Mass can take up to 2 hours. But on the subject of the Low Mass - which is better, a 30-45 minute reverent celebration of the Mass, or a one hour long huggy handshake party?

Now Father Daly goes on to tell us more about those nasty, lazy Traditionalists: "For them, a good liturgy is also one where they don't have to speak to anyone or do anything. Their whole attitude says 'I want no commitment and I want no communication.'"

By the time I read this, I was already feeling sorry for Father Daly, and this only made me feel worse. It's like he's trying to make himself look like a complete ass. Cleaning alter linens (there are a lot more for a Tridentine Mass), cleaning the church, caring for all of the many sacred vestments and objects used, serving the Mass (High Masses can have 10 or more servers, easily) - not to mention church socials or stopping for a chat after mass (outside the church, of course). They is quite a bit of commitment necessary for a Tridentine Latin Mass.

To close his article, Father Daly says the following of the Latin Mass: "We can offer it. But almost nobody will come."

Ignoring both the old who come to the Mass they were raised with and the young families who come looking for a truly reverent Mass, Father Daly ends with what almost sounds like a vain hope that the Tridentine will fail.

Father Daly obviously doesn't like the Tridentine Mass, and even shows contempt for those who do. Maybe he hopes to show traditionalists the light with his article, so that they may come to the Novus Ordo he loves so much. If that is is goal, I can confidently say that "almost nobody will come."

However, I don't think that is his intention. I think, more than anything, he is simple trying to pacify his own fears that maybe, just maybe, somebody will come.
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